Dear Mum

Dear Mum,

 You are amazing. Everything you went through with me as a baby and now your going through it again with me and my baby. You say compared to how I was when I was a baby that Seren is quite good. If that's true then OMG how hard was i? I find Seren hard to cope with some days.

There's many things I could write in this and it wouldn't really mean anything. All I know is your amazing. You've not just been my mum but my best friend and I never really got it till now. Yes we clash because we're both headstrong. Yes we've argued, but if it wasn't for you I wouldn't have got through my labour. I wouldn't have had an a assisted delivery I know for a fact if you wasn't there it would have been a section. I have so much to thank you for. All them years cleaning me up and cuddling me, all those accident you fixed with special kisses and magic water to make it all better. All them problems at school you fought tirelessly. Just for me. I always remember saying stop interfering it's ok. It was never ok to be bullied and you fought my corner, even that time when I did do wrong and use my fists. You stood in my corner cause now I realise that's what mums do.

Your not just any mum. Your MY mum. Your loved so much. I appreciate you so much. I wish I could turn back the clocks and never argue with you, I'm hoping that's just par of growing up. Your my inspiration mum. The most amazing woman on the planet and I'm so lucky because your MY mum.

Xxxx

4 weeks

So we are 4 weeks into motherhood and for Seren 4 weeks into the world and now it's a week of mental development. But my poor baby also keeps getting a temperature. At the moment she's managed about 15 mins sleep since she woke up this morning at 9:45. This is because we are currently both lay in mummy's bed! I do love being mummy just when I'm getting cried at constantly it gets hard. I wouldn't change it for the world though. Even 15 mins sleep is better than none and it may help her temperature f she gets some sleep.

Since day one she's been a good sleeper at night only ever waking once or twice so I'm really lucky there seeing as I know some people are up all night with there babies. We are 2 weeks post tounge tie and her feeding has just got better and better to be honest. I'm so proud of her. However my dinky dot still fits in first size and 0-3 are still massive on her. To be honest it really is just a quick update on how we are getting on. 

Neglected

So I haven't been here for ages and it seems I've neglected you all but I haven't honestly. Ok maybe I have and I'm sorry, but it has been hetic in my life at the moment and that's because I have a new baby. That's right no longer pregnant no more pregnancy posts but I do need to finish off my pregnancy posts so that's going to be confusing. 

So today at 07:27 my little girl will be 2 weeks old! God how the time flies!! Seren Jade was born on 31st August 2014 weighing 8lb13oz. So I will fill you in more soon as I do want to try get some sleep because little miss Seren Jade has had me up since 5! 

I'll leave you all with a picture 

Our first cuddle

(TRIGGER WARNING) A Battle - Still Fighting

  Yesterday the world payed and are still paying tributes to a great actor and comedian who sadly cut his life short because of Depression. Unfortunately Robin Williams took his own life, it was the only option he felt he had. I know what people are going to say. Why didn't he get help? What about his family? That he made a selfish decision. But how can you judge? Have you been in his shoes have you faced the battles he has? 

  Until you've been in the place he was you can't say anything. I suffer with depression. I've been fighting this battle since I was 14-15. I've suffered with depression I still do, I no longer take my anti-depressants. I feel like I don't need to but I still have daily struggles. I still have days where I feel I don't want to do anything, don't want to get up in the morning. 

Depression isn't something you can just get over. See I've self-harmed, I have cut myself to try and stop the emotional pain I'm feeling. I've tried to end my own life, I'm still here I failed. I was told I did it for attention. That made me feel lower than low. I did it because I felt there was no other way. 

So when you think of Robin Williams don't think of the way his life ended, think of all he achieved. Think of all the laughter and joy he gave you in your childhood. Be that as a alien, Peter Pan, A Scientist, Dr. Patch Adams or even Mrs. Doubtfire these films are what he lived for he lived to make people laugh. To bring joy to adults as well as children. We're lucky there are still 4 films we will see him in! So let his memories lives on in the characters we all love! 

R.I.P.  Robin Williams 

Garden Renovations - Part 3

So today dad has decided to renovate the rabbit hutch so that it is easier to clean for me and mum. Which means putting the run on the the side of the hutch. It also means we can now have the kitchen window open when cooking which may make us less grumpy when cooking now. Luckily with 2 men it should be done faster but dad and John are like Laurel and Hardy. So I'm guessing it's just going to take them longer. Let's hope they at least go to the skip because we have a mattress that is clogging up our landing! For the next week I'm going to have a lot of time on my hands as I'm going to Tamworth for the week to look after Johns dog. It's going to be a interesting week. So for now I'm signing out as there's loads to do. 

35 Weeks Pregnant

So as of Thursday I was/am 35 weeks pregnant. I'm so glad I'm near the end though now. At the moment we are expierencing the hottest weather ever! So hot I'm writing this at 19:15 and it is 27.3 degrees still. To say I am coping would be a massive understatement because I don't feel like I'm coping at all! I feel all stupid because I don't look pregnant and I'm struggling so much in the heat! The symptoms I'm expierencing don't help me either but you would have thought oh she's used to them by now. Yeah I am but these odd new ones I'm not. So the symptoms this week are:

Heartburn

Indigestion

Swollen feet

Headache/Migraine (which won't go away with pain killers)

Pins and needles in my back and toes

Pain in tummy which I can't tell difference to if it's baby moving or pain

Lower backache 

Come on princess mummy's getting fed up now 

Hospital Bag

I've half packed my hospital bag today but really need to finish it off! I really don't know what I need to take for myself and I know I should google it but everything else just seems to be getting in the way. It's either to hot to do it or I say I don't have old clothes to use and everything but I really should sort it out even if it means going and getting bits and pieces to put in it. I have all the baby's stuff though so that's the most important but if it's still this hot she won't need her blanket at all!!